Perpilili Vivienne Tiongson,
"I Hate My Mother!": Magnetic levitation, a grain of rice & 3 women
Cacho Publishing, 2007.

Ages 14+

"I Hate My Mother!": Magnetic levitation, a grain of rice & 3 women is a young adult novel, in English, by Filipino writer Perpilili Tiongson. The book aptly introduces readers to the emotional fabric of one teen's family life. The three women its title refers to are Belinda (Bell), the narrator, her mother, and her sister Cory. Bell's words, raw and diary-like, expose her struggles at home.

Written in the unique way Filipino teenagers use English, and generously peppered with Filipino words and phrases, "I Hate My Mother!" traces the transformation of Bell's awe of her mom's wisdom as a little girl, to her bewilderment, annoyance, and frustration with her mother, as a teenager.

"...as the years went by, it only became harder for me to understand anything Mommy would say... Like she was losing the wisdom Dad always talked about when I was a little girl."

After her father dies, Bell clings to his words that one day she will come to understand her mom's wisdom. Contrary to his words, however, she finds herself in constant conflict with a mother whom she doesn't understand--and the lack of understanding seems to be mutual. Her relationship with her sister isn’t that easy for Bell either: while she and Cory are very close, Cory doesn't understand and indeed disapproves of her rage toward their mother. Bell's antagonistic feelings, expressed boldly throughout the narrative, seem to work as an anchor for her, giving her life the substance she feels it otherwise lacks.

When Bell has to write a college essay relating a physics principle to her everyday life, her professor, using the opposite ends of a pen as magnetic poles, demonstrates how hard it is to tell where one pole ends and the other begins. Similarly, the professor continues, “how can one tell where hate ends and love begins?”. Despite having no answer to offer, Bell is hit hard by the realization that this parallel might apply to her feelings about her mother.

In this novel, Tiongson gives readers an almost pitch-perfect example of the ambiguous emotions teenagers often feel toward their parents. There is no happy ending for this emotionally powerful ride; no neat resolution for the complicated mother-daughter relationship. However, its open ending hints at the fact that there are certain things we only come to have a grasp of once we grow up in years and mature emotionally.  This should satisfy and ring true to young adult readers anywhere.

Tarie Sabido
October 2009